Someone listening to and meeting your needs isn’t a favor or “special” – it is a basic part of being in ANY sort of relationship with another person/s. Communicating your need is a right.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
But specifically speaking in terms of romantic relationships – What are needs and why do we need our partner/s to meet them?⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Needs can vary from a need for touch or emotional connection to a need for them to prioritize your orgasms⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
And here’s the thing about needs – you’re not wrong for having them.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Quick tips around naming needs:
Get clear on your needs – Ask yourself what it is you actually need and why
Express why you need it – If your partner/s can understand it and why it’s important to you, it can help them meet it better
Ask them if they need support meeting that need – Even if we think we’re really clear about a need, it may not be clear to another person/s
Ask them if they understand what you’re asking – Check-in and give them the opportunity to ask questions
Ask if they have any conflicting needs – We never want to ask our partner/s to sacrifice their own needs to meet our own, so if meeting a need clashes with one of their own, how can you work together to accomplish it all?
Most importantly: Work this like a muscle. It takes practice but trust that this will get more comfortable with time for you and your partner/s ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Here’s your encouragement to start naming your needs. Ask your partner/s for what you want. If it’s to put their towels in the hamper or to go down on you – name. those. needs.⠀⠀
Communicating your needs and listening to theirs is more than essential to a healthy relationship – it’s necessary.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Do you currently feel comfortable naming your needs in your relationship/s? Why or why not? Tell me in the comments!
Calee Shea is a Holistic Health Practioner based in Atlanta, Georgia. She is your go-to gal for all things periods, vaginal health, and sex.